Sunday, December 4, 2016

Dressing Melania



What's a poor girl to do when she can't even get Tom Ford to dress her.  But don't worry, Melania won't have to go in her birthday suit to the inauguration. Tommy Hilfiger said he would be proud to dress her.  It's just the latest in the faux couture outrage being sparked by a Trump administration.  It's not like Melania had anything to worry about as there are plenty of designers ready to drape her in their garments.

However, it is doubtful that Melania will be the face of this new administration.  Trump leaned heavily on his daughter, Ivanka, throughout the election cycle and it is safe to assume this is the image he will project during his administration.  He also leaned heavily on her husband, Jared Kushner, who is said to have been the brains behind the improbable victory, not Bannon or Conway, who are often given credit.  So, Melania will have plenty of time to work on ridding the web of cyber-bullies.

It is safe to say we have never had a first lady quite like this one.  She was known more for her racy photo shoots than for the garments she wore (or didn't wear) as a model.  Donald had great fun with her during the surprisingly long courtship that ultimately led to the wedding aisle in 2005, one of the hottest tickets that year.  He even had Billy Joel singing Uptown Girl at his reception.

No doubt it was a dream come true for the Slovenian model, who now finds herself a folk hero back in her hometown of Ljubljana.  They even named the Christmas tree after her.  But, she drew the line at honey and underwear.  After all, the first lady has an image to protect.

As for Ivanka, it is hard to imagine what she thinks of all this.  She's been surprisingly quiet in the wake of the election victory.  Even before the big day she had been keeping a low profile.  Maybe she felt her father had gone too far with some of his more vicious outbursts, or she too had a hard time reconciling the audio tape of her father bragging about all his affairs.  One assumes all is forgiven now that she stands to be the most powerful first daughter in American history.

Only Alice Roosevelt can serve as a measure for Ivanka.  The sassy first daughter of Teddy Roosevelt didn't let herself be defined by anyone, and like Ivanka had to deal with a stepmom in the White House.  Teddy's first wife, whom Alice was named after, had died, leaving a great hole in the family.  Ivanka is older and presumably wiser at 34.  Alice was 24 at the end of the Roosevelt administration.

Ivanka is also a better dresser than Melania and much more confident in her appearances.  Of course, it all comes natural for her as she was raised in an opulent lifestyle, attended the best schools and married a savvy husband, who clearly knows how to play the system when it comes to media strategy.  The two no doubt will work hard to keep their father out of trouble over the next four years.

One imagines they are also trying to temper his cabinet appointments, which is leading to some buyers' remorse among his more vociferous supporters, who thought he was going to pull from their ranks.  The appointment of Steven Mnuchin as Treasury Secretary has the alt-right up in arms.  They also aren't very happy about Nikki Haley as UN ambassador, as she once criticized the Donald.  But, you figure the media strategy is to play both ends against the middle.

Anyway, it doesn't look like this election will be overturned by the recounts or the electoral college.  Like it or not, someone will have to dress Melania.


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